Category: Blog

No Big Problems

There are no big problems, there are just a lot of little problems. – Henry Ford

So it is in life.

We have no big problems, only lots of little problems that combine and feel like big problems.

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The only thing between a fulfilled, authentic life is the solving of these little problems.

The key is to tackle the right little problems, first.

That’s what I do with my clients: Identify and Solve.

Over and over, until that fulfilled, authentic life is happening – until it’s created.

Then, the client is a skilled problem-solver.

With that new-found skill, and only then, one can live a fulfilled, authentic life, as they solve the (little) problems that come along.

Perhaps The Most Important Post I’ve Ever Written

Feeling is what you get for thinking the way you do. – Marilyn vos Savant

We are not X because of Y, we are X because of our thinking about Y

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In the above X = how we’re feeling and Y =anything outside us.

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So many don’t get this. They think that how they’re feeling, and their situation, is because of things outside themselves.

I won’t get into whether or not anyone’s “situation” is because of things outside them or not (although most of the time, and mostly, it is . . . ); rather, I’ll focus on what’s more important: how we’re feeling and where that comes from.

We feel the way we do because of what think.

If you think something is unfair, you are going to feel slighted.

If you think someone is mean, whatever they do or say is likely to hurt you, or, at the very least, you are going to feel as if they are going to hurt your feelings at some point.

If you think the Life is hard, you are going to feel as if the odds are stacked against you.

BUT:

If you think some people act in unfair ways, but they are a minority and that there are more “good” people out there, then you will shake off any perceived injustices and keep moving towards what you want.

If you think someone is troubled, for whatever reason, you are going to feel some sort of sympathy, or perhaps even empathy, for them.

If you think the World is challenging, but yields to experimentation and hard work, you’ll feel like doing hard work.

I could on and on and on . . . .

But I won’t, because I think you get the point – at least you do if you’re willing to think differently.

Play Your Cards Right

Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well. – Josh Billings

Life is perfect.

“Perfect” in the sense that everything happens because of the choices each of us makes, and the combination and accumulation of all of our choices.

Things are perfect because they cannot be any other way.

The hope in this perfection is that because we created this perfect Now, we can “reverse-engineer” our desired future based on what we can observe and imagine.

We can observe that A, B, and C created this and (thus) we can imagine that X, Y and Z might yield that.

Once we have observed our results and imagined different actions, we can get to the doing.

We can then play our cards right.*

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* Or at least righter and create a better result that in the process of its creation makes us wiser – and better able to begin yet again, next time.

The Three Stages of Success

I was recently thinking about the nature of “success.”

Of course, it’s a process and a journey and not a “completion” or a destination, but how can we better understand the process, the journey of “success?”

Well, I came up with three phases, each marked by three key ideas: Responsibility, Maturity and Wisdom.

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I – Getting unstuck / making major progress on your Key Project.

Until we get serious about what we want to do now we cannot hope to be successful.

We must take Responsibility for where we are, what we are letting get in the way of what we want and then taking consistent action towards what we really want to accomplish.

II – Living well and integrating all areas of your life in an authentic way.

Once we, as adults, understand what it means to work on, and accomplish, things that matter, we move to the next phase of success: Maturity.

Being mature is more than just doing something important. It’s knowing that we are multi-faceted beings with different areas of priority and taking excellent care of these areas.

It’s making the tough decisions about time/energy allocation so that we keep what we value and desire in balance.

It’s making the necessary investments in ourselves, our families and our work so we may show up well in each of those areas.

It means we integrate our values, priorities and goals in a way that is workable and sustainable.

This can be difficult: it requires sacrifice, it requires self-care and it requires sometimes delaying gratification.

It requires maturity.

III – Sustaining Integration and doing Legacy work.

The next phase builds on the first two.

Is the embodiment of the third key: Wisdom.

A life of wisdom is marked by a sense of what works and what is required.

It’s knowing that once one has developed years of experience, as a person, a family member and a practitioner of something (or as it’s increasing likely, multiple somethings), that there are investments of time and effort that are important to make – given what one knows.

It’s seeing the forest for the trees and knowing there’s something the forest needs, something that matters to more than one tree, or one person who might encounter the forest.

This is the Legacy Phase. The time in life where all the important work one has does comes together, it coalesces and begins to become a sum greater than its parts.

But this coalescing doesn’t happen by accident.

It happens by design.

And it’s important.

And it requires planning, intention, effort and wisdom.

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The framework I’ve laid out here is both simple and complex.

It can seem overwhelming if you’re not even aware of the first phase, how it works and its vital importance.

But that critical first phase (Responsibility) and that which follows is exactly what I help my clients with.

If you want to learn more about the work I do and how I help my clients, click here to schedule a Demonstration Session.

How To Do What You Really Want To Do

Where does the energy, and perseverance, to do important, meaningful things come from?

The origin of that well is the soul.

The details are the thoughts, habits and actions of one’s life.

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The only way to do great things is to know what great things are to you – to your soul.

When you know your soul, you know yourself.

When you know yourself, you can know what is truly meaningful to you.

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When you do those things, your soul rejoices – and you live well, and fully.