An Open Letter to Mid-Life Men*



What brought you here?

Is life basically good, but . . . ?

Do you have as much energy, money and love (and sex) as you want?

I didn’t.

I was 57.5 pounds over-weight, really out-of-shape, angry at myself over my choices and wishing I had a partner in life.

Some things were good:

I had family and friends who loved and cared for me, I was basically healthy and I had a job which I enjoyed and was good at.

Fundamentally though, things were shit.

I was drinking too much, wishing I could lose weight while still eating what I wanted (whenever I wanted), watching TV to escape and feeling ugly and ashamed about what my body had become.

And then, I had a realization: 1) all the shit behaviors I was repeating were clues to the work I needed to do and 2) I wasn’t going to meet anyone to love until I loved myself (and put that love into action by making better choices, every day).

I knew I had start doing the work of making better choices.

I had to stop thinking magical thoughts and wishing – and get f*cking real.

I had to accept that I had chosen myself into a health- and mind-set over a period of years – and getting out of it was going to take some time, and work, and effort and self-care.

So I committed to 1) be honest, real and clear about what I wanted and 2) face what I was doing to keep it out of my life.

It was hard.

I worked my ass off.

Day after day, week after week and month after month.

I chose my way back to the person I so desperately wanted to be – I did the work.

Does any of that resonate with you?

Are you doing okay, but you know “okay” is shit?

That “okay” isn’t the standard you want to hold for yourself?

That you want more, and better, but just aren’t sure where to start?

That, deep down, you know you can’t go on like this, but you’re not sure how to change?

CALL ME: 860-264-4356

Let’s talk.

I can help.

*   *   *

* I wrote this Labor Day Weekend, 2020. I wrote looking forward to who I wanted to become, to the person I knew I could be. I will update this once I reach my goals. I write this knowing that whatever it is I truly, deeply want to create is possible and available to me – if I do the work. If you work with me I’ll hold the same space for you. I’ll believe in your potential even if you can’t quite see it right now. Whatever it is that you’ve been trying to do, change, create, I will help you create a plan that works, that installs the beliefs and habits you’ll need, that creates the shifts and growth necessary to become who want and need to be next and celebrate with you as you achieve the goals that matter – to you.

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