I watched a video this morning that triggered me.
It was one of those I-just-have-a-minute-here-on-vacation videos shot by some self-help-ey kinda people and as far as it went it was okay, I guess.
The person was talking about how important it is to shift from “lack” thinking to “abundance” thinking – an attitude of gratitude and all that.
Her main point was to start small and focus on something that you like about yourself and build on that.
The problem, or my problem, was that she didn’t take it any further, or talk about the role we play in the sh_t in our lives.
I’ve talked about taking responsibility for what we don’t have, and what we have, in life (while being careful to avoid self-shaming).
What we need to hear, and focus on, is that 1) there is much to be grateful for and we are amazing beings with much to offer and 2) our behavior (most critically, our habits) sometimes sucks.
Yup, we are sometimes lazy, or careless, or afraid to try.
We keep our selves small and safe.
But it’s a false sense of security.
Most people feel they can play small and be okay, just get by (and not get hurt by disappointment or “failure”).
That’s not how it works though.
If you’re not moving forward you’re slipping back.
If you want to change your life, or even if you just want it to be a better version of what you have now, you’ve got to do the work.
Does it help to think positively and find something to focus on that you like and appreciate?
But you must pair that with hard work on what you’re doing to set yourself back.
Because if you’re not taking responsibility for your life and working on the crap you do (or don’t do) that doesn’t serve your well-being and goals, things are going to get worse.*
* Maybe not noticeably in any given moment, day,week or month, but over time. The kind of “worse” that shows up when you get to the end of the year and you look back on how “things” have gone.