The Nasty Middle

There’s a place between not taking consistent action on a goal and being unable or unwilling to release said goal. I call this place the Nasty Middle.

If I can get real with you for a minute I find myself in the “nasty middle” on something.

My weight.

I say I want to weigh less… that my Ideal Weight is 178 pounds. And it is, and I do want to weigh that, but it’s really, really hard sometimes.

Sometimes I ask myself why I focus so closely on my weight (and my fitness*)? Why not just let it go?

I don’t let it go, because that doesn’t really work for me.

Truth-be-told, I need the consistent focus on my weight, and how many push-ups and body-weight squats I can do, and how challenging my Pilates routine is… because if I didn’t I would eat too much crap and not exercise enough.

So I find myself in the “nasty middle” sometimes, a place where I am struggling with my goal, but unwilling to abandon it.

Just knowing that such a “place” exists is helpful in that once I name it, I can leave it.

(By the way, I am pleased to report that I am making progress and doing well with my journey to my Ideal Weight. Since I renewed my focus in mid-October 2012 I have shed 15 pounds, am about 10 pounds away from my goal and increased my strength and flexibility.)

* Please know that my goal really is a holistic one: to weigh 178 pounds and be lean, strong and flexible.

 

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