The greatest gift you can give to somebody is your own personal development. I used to say, ‘If you will take care of me, I will take care of you.’ Now I say, ‘I will take care of me for you if you will take care of you for me.’ – Jim Rohn
Is this quote just a play on words?
Is he really just being clever?
Because where-you-come-from on anything matters.
The former construction is one of need, and contingency.
When you ask someone to take care of you, and offer care of the other in return you are telling them – and yourself – that you’re not enough (without some outside agency).
Not only is that incorrect (you are more than enough), it sets up a fundamentally flawed relationship.
A relationship in which both of you are always wondering if the other is providing enough and if the “exchange” is even.
The latter expresses a healthy relationship. One in which both parties understand and grow themselves independently –and create a pairing of equals.
It establishes that neither one needs the other and both are whole and capable.
* * *
Put another way, relationships can either be seen as 50/50 or 100/100.
In the former, each is reliant on the other to “complete” the other.
The latter is a synergy of two “completes” coming together to enrich, challenge and grow each other even more.
Me? I’m shooting for 100/100.