Three Power Questions

As a coach I love questions.

In fact, questions are coaching. It’s the willingness for the coach to be open to asking and not knowing that allows for the client to create their own answers – and the actions that follow.

Here are three of my favorites:

What do I really want?

When you take the time to really think about what you want you can look at what you’ve been getting more intelligently. You can compare your actions to your results, in light of the results you want. When you do this you can choose more wisely.

How can I do it?

Implicit in asking how is “I can.”

When the only thing between you and your desired result is method you make progress possible, likely even.

The how of anything is almost always available. There’s little that anyone wants to do that hasn’t been done before, by someone, in some way – and they leave clues. More often than not, someone has written a book (or something similar) about the experience. (And, of course, a coach can help with the “how” of anything you want to create!)

Be willing to ask “How?” The method is there, somewhere.

What can I learn from this?

So many encounter difficulty, or un-ease, or frustration, or “failure” and get angry, or withdrawn, or resigned, or hopeless.

The key theme with any of those reactions is that they shut-down the opportunity for the experience to be valuable – to be a piece of information that can be converted to wisdom.

This “wisdom” gets created when we take an experience and look at the inputs and the result and ask “How can we change the inputs to create the desired result?”

When we look at problems, or “failures,” in such a way – as lessons – we can learn and grow from experiences.

Similar Posts

  • What Actual Humility Is

    Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less. – C.S. Lewis So many people (or at least the ones with enough self-awareness) get this wrong. They think, consciously or otherwise, that they need to make themselves smaller, or lesser, to be “humble.” It’s a mistake of thinking. You’re amazing. You have…

  • Is THIS Getting In Your Way?

    It’s the people around us who shape us and our behavior. Ask the BIG question: “What do you want to achieve in life?” And then think, “Are the people I’m hanging around helping me achieve this?” – Craig Ballantyne This is one of the most difficult things to ask yourself. Humans are social creatures and…

  • Cognitive and Physical Knowledge

    There’s a difference between cognitive knowledge (facts, ideas, etc., in your brain) and physical knowledge (being able to perform certain actions to achieve a result). And both are important. To know something cognitively is to study it in-depth: to read books from experts, consult with people who have experience and understand the component parts of…

  • The Primacy of Emotions

    “People don’t buy for logical reasons. They buy for emotional reasons.” – Zig Ziglar In fact, emotions are why we do everything. Logical, thoughtful, consideration may be a precursor to action, but without the animating energy of emotions nothing happens. Yes, our thoughts determine our lives, but emotions actually create our lives. I recently had…

  • What Is Risk, Really?

    “Risk comes from not knowing what you’re doing.” – Warren Buffett There are many things we are not prepared for, that we will never encounter. There are, however, many things that we can reasonably expect to encounter, that we could prepare for, that we ignore (for whatever reason… ). Some examples: Divorce is (generally) a…