It’s Not Out There

Happiness is your nature. It is not wrong to desire it. What is wrong is seeking it outside when it is inside. – Ramana Maharshi

I have been thinking a lot about how “personal development” works.

How do we live a “good” life?

How do we achieve our goals?

How do we exist in a world that sometimes feels too big, confusing and isolating?

It would seem that most of the “answers” out there are to do this, or that, and not do this, or that. And if you want it bad enough, you’ll get “it.”

The problem is I don’t think that’s how it works.

All that advice, all those strategies and tactics rest on a core assumption: that “it” is out there.

What if the opposite were true?

What if instead of going outside our selves and doing and getting and stopping and starting were wrong?

What if all we needed to do was go within?

What if all we needed to do was uncover the beauty and genius and passion and purpose and power that is underneath all the crap we’ve taken on over the years?

What if we are covered in layers of what our parents (as well-meaning and doing-their-best as they were), and our schools and our friends and society and culture have heaped upon us?

The layers of stuff we took on because we’re social animals that need to belong?

What if forgave them, and ourselves, for that and asked ourselves: what if I was perfect and magical, at my core?

Well, it’s true.

We are.

We are perfect and magical and whole and amazing and strong and  . . .

We’ve just taken on habits of thinking, believing, feeling and acting that keeps us safe (i.e. in the tribe/pack/group and not doing anything that seems risky).

All we need to do is look at what we’re thinking, believing, feeling and doing and ask ourselves: is this in alignment with my perfect wholeness, my true nature, or is it serving something else?

If it’s something else do something else.

Similar Posts

  • The Beauty of Service

    Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less. – C.S. Lewis Real humility is where kindness comes from. When we think of ourselves less, when we know we’re okay, we can look beyond ourselves. This is where and when really, really cool things can happen. This is where service happens. Any…

  • Progress Or Story?

    A man who wants to do something will find a way; A man who doesn’t will find an excuse. – Stephen Dolley, Jr. It matters less what the ultimate result is; only that one has started, and worked, and learned, and adapted, and finished “something.” Or we can make up a story about why we can’t…

  • Shine From Within

    People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within. – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross Of course it’s easy to be happy and positive when things are good, but what about when things are…

  • A View of Enlightenment

    I read recently that the Dalai Lama said that enlightenment is love and insight working together, like wings on a bird. I love this idea because it conjures a rich metaphor for understanding our lives. Neither love or insight alone is enough to live well. Both must come together and act in concert for us to to…

  • Choose Growth, Focus on Love

    One can choose to go back toward safety or forward toward growth. Growth must be chosen again and again; fear must be overcome again and again. – Abraham Maslow I would edit Maslow’s suggestion a bit and suggest that rather than (concerning ourselves with) “overcoming fear,” that we focus on its opposite: love. Choose growth…

  • An Alternative to Ruination

    I received a message (included in its entirety below) from a mentor of mine that I wanted to share. The idea that we’d rather be ruined than change is real for so many people (they just don’t know it, consciously). What’s happening with so many people is that, by playing it safe, they are quietly…